Like the Constitution, the Declaration of Independence is filled with old-fashioned ideas about liberty, freedom, and restrictions on the power of government.
But that’s no fun, at least if you’re a member of the ruling class. Heck, some people are using those musty old documents to argue that the crowd in Washington doesn’t have unlimited power to impose Obamacare. The nerve of those yokels!
There are rumors, though, that the Declaration of Independence is being updated to reflect the modern and enlightened thinking of the political elite.
Indeed, there’s even a draft of this new document, which was leaked when somebody in the Harvard political science department failed to use proper security when emailing edits to allies at CBS, the DNC, the IMF, and Justice Kagan’s office.
Apparently, the drafters are fighting over some of the edits. They know they want to replace “He has erected a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.”
But they’re not satisfied with the current language, which reads, “They failed to erect a multitude of New Offices, and sent hither inadequate swarms of Officers to harrass our people, and eat out their substance.”
You can click the link to read the full Draft Declaration of Dependence, but some excerpts are reprinted below to give you a flavor for the new approach.
We hold these truths to be self-evident, that all people should be made equal, that they are endowed by their government with certain unalienable Rights, that among these are jobs, healthcare and housing.–That to secure these rights, Governments must rule over the people, deriving their just powers from the consent of the elite, –That whenever the people becomes destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the Elite to alter or to abolish it, and to institute more Government, laying its foundation on such principles and organizing its powers in such form, as to them shall seem most likely to effect the power and control of the elite. …We, therefore, the Representatives of the political elite, in faculty lounges, Assembled, appealing to the United Nations for the rectitude of our intentions, do, in the Name, and by Authority of government, solemnly publish and declare, That the American people ought to be governed by the United Nations; that they are Absolved from all Allegiance to the Constitution, and that all political connection between them and the Founding Fathers, is and ought to be totally dissolved; and that as highly-taxed and dependent States, they have full Power to levy taxes, disrupt Peace, contract new departments and agencies, regulate Commerce, and to do all other Acts and Things which the political elite may of right do. And for the support of this Declaration, with a firm reliance on the protection of the establishment media, we mutually demand your Lives, your Fortunes and your sacred Honor.
